ACROSS AMERICA — How do you set boundaries for your neighbor’s kids when they won’t go home?
Consider this scenario or some variation of it:
Your kids and the neighbors’ kids are pals, but all of their time together seems to be spent at your house. You buy the snacks and set an extra place at the table. It’s your back yard or swimming pool they play in. They hang out in your family room, use your Wi-Fi and streaming services, and help themselves to whatever is in the fridge.
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The kid’s parents are nice enough people and financially able to reciprocate. But it’s not a 50/50 arrangement, or even a 30/70. They seem happy with the situation and the opportunities it gives them to enjoy childless adventures — or so it seems from your vantage point. You’d like some time alone without your kids, or with just your kids.
Do you ask the child’s parents to chip in some money for meals and spur-of-the-moment events where the neighbor kids tag along? How do you even things out without alienating the neighbors? Anything you do can affect the kids’ friendship. And they’re paying attention to how you handle it, forming takeaways that may or may not be what you intended about things like inclusion and generosity.
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